Voices of Black Mothers United https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/ Tue, 07 Sep 2021 15:11:30 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.0.2 https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/wp-content/uploads/cropped-VBMU-Favicon-32x32.png Voices of Black Mothers United https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/ 32 32 Mothers of murdered children can help end gun violence. Listen to us. https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/mothers-murdered-children-end-gun-violence/ Tue, 07 Sep 2021 15:11:30 +0000 https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/?p=224 Instead of looking for top-down, government-centered solutions, we should look to the communities themselves.

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Mothers of murdered children can help end gun violence. Listen to us.   

Mothers of murdered children can help end gun violence. Listen to us. 

By Donita Royal 

 

My son, Walter, was just 21 years old when he was murdered. Our once peaceful neighborhood had erupted in a spree of senseless, mindless violence. Walter had gone to college. He had a stable job. He was a good kid. But none of that mattered. One day, he was shot down and killed in downtown Indianapolis. And nothing has been the same for me since.

Walter died in 2013, and he was not the only victim. I had to share my tremendous grief with the mother of Walter’s best friend, Darius, who was gunned down when he was 20 years old. When crime goes unchecked, none of our children are safe.

Indianapolis’ surging criminal violence has fallen upon vulnerable neighborhoods and families with no signs of stopping. There were 215 criminal homicides in Indianapolis in the last year - the highest yearly number of homicides ever recorded in the city.

Yet according to records compiled by the Indianapolis Star, we’re already on pace to surpass that number this year.

Our city is not alone in facing a growing epidemic of criminal violence. American cities across the country have been experiencing similar crime waves. According to a report by the Major Cities Chiefs Association, 66 of the the 70 cities experienced increases in either homicide, rape, or aggravated assault in comparison to 2020.

As a mother, I want to say loud and clear: enough is enough. I’ve stood side by side with far too many grieving mothers and far too many hurting families. But despite how real our loss is, the national narrative around crime and police reform doesn’t include our stories. That needs to change.

That’s why I started my nonprofit called Mothers Against Violence Healing Ministry in 2015. I wanted to create a place where mothers could get together to support each other and help to make their voices heard. Now that we have become part of The Woodson Center’s Voices of Black Mothers United Initiative, we have a chance to amplify our truth nationwide.

A big part of that truth is the pain we feel. The mothers in our group often show up at many of our city’s crime scenes to make contact with the victim’s mother. We attend funerals as a group; we take meals to the mother’s home and sit and talk with her. We share our pain, bear each other’s burdens, and also try to find something positive and purposeful out of the pain. But while our main goal is healing, we know that our healing includes putting a stop to crime. We are sick of the violence.  We want solutions.

First of all, we must speak the truth about the importance of the police in our communities. 

Studies show that bolstering police presence actually does reduce crime. There’s a reason why 81% of Black people asked in a Gallup Poll said they want police to spend the same amount of or more time in their area. In the same survey, 90% of those polled reported favoring specific reforms aimed at improving police relations with the communities they serve and preventing or punishing abusive behavior.

We agree.  We advocate for increased funding to train police for conflict resolution skills, and tactics to discourage excessive and irresponsible law enforcement tactics.

In addition, we need a better approach to community relations and youth engagement. My group of moms works to strengthen partnerships between young people, community groups and law enforcement. We invite more leaders into our neighborhoods to get to know the people.

Building these relationships can deter violent crime, and build trust when investigations are required. For the corporations that are funding anti-racist initiatives, please consider supporting local organizations that are investing in at-risk young people and violence free zones. Those investments will save Black lives.

For the sake of all Indianapolis residents, we must address the epidemic of violence together. That means listening to the families of murdered children, and keeping our police force intact in the communities that need protection. We’ve had enough, and we don’t want another mother to experience the pain of burying a murdered child.

Donita Royal is the Indiana Chapter Director for the Woodson Center’s Voices of Black Mothers United initiative and Director for the Mothers Against Violence Healing Ministry.

 

Read the Full Article on IndyStar. 

 
 
 
 

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It’s Black Moms Who May Solve Spiking Murder Rates https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/its-black-moms-who-may-solve-spiking-murder-rates/ Wed, 30 Jun 2021 19:04:05 +0000 https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/?p=214 Instead of looking for top-down, government-centered solutions, we should look to the communities themselves.

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It's Black Moms Who May Solve Spiking Murder Rates   

It's Black Moms Who May Solve Spiking Murder Rates 

By Patrice Lee Onwuka 

 

This is the first of a three-part series.

The year 2020 will be remembered for the pandemic, social unrest and the presidential election. It should be remembered for the massive one-year spike in murders that robbed so many mothers of children.

The Black Lives Matter social justice movement is focused on race relations and the treatment of minorities by police. Yet, it ignores that most of the Black lives lost last year to murder were not at the hands of police, but other Blacks.

The time to address the violence plaguing communities is now. Instead of looking for top-down, government-centered solutions, we should look to the communities themselves where mothers, fathers and law enforcement are working together to solve crimes, prevent violence and restore trust between neighborhoods and police.

The statistics of rising violent crime in America should be alarming. From 2019 to 2020, murders jumped nearly 95% in Milwaukee, more than 57% in Atlanta, nearly 55% in Boston, nearly 50% in Chicago, nearly 40% in New York City and 30% in Los Angeles. Homicides are on the rise in small cities as well.

It has been quite some time, perhaps 50 years, since murder rates rose so high in one year. It appears that the overall spike in murders occurred through at least three waves of violence: early in the pandemic, during the summer months and in the fall.

The easy and wrong answer for this violence is to blame poverty. Democratic New York Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez attributed New York's crime spike to unemployment: "They feel like they either need to shoplift some bread or go hungry."

Advocates use this rationale to push for more stimulus funds and expanded public benefits, but it is unsubstantiated and ignores the social safety net that is already in place. If people were desperate for bread, that did not show up in the data.

The nonpartisan criminal justice think tank, the Council on Criminal Justice, studied crime rates for 10 different offenses in 28 American cities during the pandemic and social unrest. It found that property and drug crime rates fell during the first eight months of the pandemic even as murders rose.

There were significant declines in residential burglary (-24%), larceny (-24%) and drug offense (-32%) rates from the same period in 2019. Meanwhile, homicides (42%), aggravated assaults (13%-15%) and gun assaults (15%-16%) rose significantly beginning in late May and June of 2020.

Let us consider who is dying. As Manhattan Institute scholar, Rafael Mangual, opined in The New York Times, "Black and Hispanic people have constituted at least 95 percent of the city's shooting victims every year for more than a decade ... Data through October indicates that last year was no exception." Black children also suffer the highest firearm homicide rates of all races according to the American Academy of Pediatrics.

These murder statistics, though chilling, don't adequately tell the stories of the individual lives lost. Some were as young as a 1-year-old toddler at a barbecue, a 15-month-old strapped into a car seat in the back of his father's car, or a 9-year-old standing outside of his home.

These are just a handful of the lives that were ripped away prematurely by wanton violence last year. So many repeat the names Breonna Taylor and Sandra Bland, but what about Davell Gardner and Carmelo Duncan?

Black and Hispanic people are not the leading homicide victims in absolute numbers, but they are disproportionately victims and, notably, the perpetrators share their skin color. This is an inconvenient truth that BLM organizations ignore.

Former Civil-Rights activist and founder and president of the Woodson Center, Mr. Robert L. Woodson, wrote recently, "For every unarmed black American killed by the police, hundreds are killed in neighborhood homicides."

Advocates promote defunding the police by shifting revenue away from police forces toward human services. Perhaps gutting police forces will succeed in reducing the number of police shootings and violence, but it comes at a high cost — much higher crime rates.

The Minneapolis City Council voted to dismantle its police force in the wake of George Floyd's death. Now, the shrinking police force struggles to control rising crime. How is this good for the people in this community?

Americans of all colors overwhelmingly oppose dismantling police forces and support keeping police on their streets. They do support some police reforms, especially those that require police to have good relations with the communities they serve. Those solutions exist, and women, especially black women, are pioneering approaches.

For decades mothers have rallied, held vigils and protested the senseless murders of their children. Now, mothers nationwide are taking the matter of public safety into their own hands.

More than 2,500 mothers have joined the Voices of Black Mothers United network, an initiative led by African-American mothers of murdered children, which brings together law enforcement and community partners for solutions to violence. They oppose the radical defund-the-police agenda because they know that smaller police forces will not prevent what happened to their loved ones from happening to others.

In some cases, their efforts are providing needed resources to help police forces solve crimes, something that will go a long way to rebuilding trust. The Woodson Center is supporting this initiative.

In a forthcoming "She Thinks Podcast" interview, I asked Mr. Woodson what policies he thinks would address rising crime in America. He suggested that we should make room for community-centric solutions.

Communities have the best chance of identifying the solutions that are needed for their specific areas, they'll know what drives crime and violence and have a track record of success. And success is what we need right now. Unlike many social issues, this truly is a life-or-death situation.

Read the Full Article on Newsmax. 

 
 
 

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Mother who lost daughter to gun violence pushes back against ‘Defund Police’ movement https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/mother-who-lost-daughter-to-gun-violence-pushes-back-against-defund-police-movement/ Wed, 30 Jun 2021 18:58:47 +0000 https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/?p=212 “We believe the solutions come from the same ZIP codes as the problem,” Woodson said.

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Mother who lost daughter to gun violence pushes back against 'Defund the Police' movement   

Mother who lost daughter to gun violence pushes back against 'Defund the Police' movement 

By Nikolas Lanum

 

Sylvia Bennett-Stone, who lost her daughter to gun violence in 2004, spoke out against the movement to defund the police on Friday, stating that she often wonders if her daughter would still be alive if police officers were there to help.  

"What if the police were there?" Bennett-Stone asked during an appearance on "Fox and Friends."

"[Defunding the police] is only going to result in more violence in our neighborhoods, we want to see police reformed, we want the accountability of police officers, not taking them away," she said. 

Bennett-Stone, the director of Voices of Black Mothers United, said that black on black crime in the communities is happening by "the dozens" and that people would instead rather talk about defunding the police.

"How many more children have to die before we have this conversation," Bennett-Stone said.

Bennett-Stone’s daughter Krystal, 19, was pumping gas with her girlfriend at an Alabama gas station when two men began shooting at each other. A single bullet went through Krystal’s body and lodged into the heart of her girlfriend. Both girls were killed.

Bob Woodson, president and founder of the Woodson Center, also appeared in the interview, where he called out the large statistical gap between police killings of black individuals versus black on black crime.

"A handful of people, blacks, something under 20 in the course of a year are unarmed or killed by police and 6,000 killed by other blocks," Woodson said to Ainsley Earhardt. "And yet we only hear the names of those taken by police."

Woodson also slammed Colin Kaepernick for an upcoming Super Bowl Ad with Ben & Jerry’s that is expected to criticize police. He said reducing police forces would be a "death sentence" for young black people in areas with frequent violent crimes.

 
 

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Parents of Murdered Children Deserve Answers from BLM Leaders | Opinion https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/parents-of-murdered-children-deserve-answers-from-blm-leaders-opinion/ Wed, 30 Jun 2021 18:54:41 +0000 https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/?p=216 Instead of looking for top-down, government-centered solutions, we should look to the communities themselves

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Parents of Murdered Children Deserve Answers from BLM Leaders | Opinion    

Parents of Murdered Children Deserve Answers from BLM Leaders | Opinion 

By Sylvia Bennett-Stone 

My daughter, Krystal Joy, was killed in 2004, caught in the crossfire of two gunmen while she was sitting in her car after pulling up to a gas pump. She was only 19. I've spent the past 17 years helping Black mothers deal with the grief of losing a child to senseless violence.

This is why I am outraged that leaders of the Black Lives Matter movement—who have built personal platforms on the deaths of victims like 12-year-old Tamir Rice and 16-year-old Ma'Khia Bryant—are stepping away from activism to enjoy their financial gains instead of helping support the families whose grief catapulted their movement into the national spotlight.

Patrisse Cullors, co-founder of BLM, is leaving the organization to pursue a multi-year TV development deal with Warner Bros. She owns at least four homes totaling more than $3 million. Meanwhile, Lisa Simpson, the mother of 18-year-old victim Richard Risher, said in March she is facing homelessness and says she has never received any financial assistance from the BLM organization; instead, she says BLM leaders called her "a liar and crazy." Breonna Taylor's mother has called BLM a "fraud" for claiming to raise money on behalf of her daughter but never giving back to the families they purported to help.

The BLM foundation took in just over $90 million last year. But it won't reveal how much (if any) it gave to help the families of Black victims, many of whom need financial assistance to pay for counseling, food or rent as they take time off work to deal with crippling grief.

After my daughter's death, I remember going out to the same store I had shopped at for years and not being able to find my way back home. Losing a child is every parent's worst nightmare. The first week, you are numb. You have to remind yourself to breathe as you go through the motions of contacting loved ones and making funeral arrangements. The second week, you are in denial. You don't really believe your baby is gone; you keep expecting a call explaining that there was some sort of mistake. By week three, the unthinkable reality has started to set in. Everyone else has gone back to their normal lives, and your loss is no longer a priority. You are alone, left to figure out how to continue living without your child. You still forget to breathe sometimes. I have conversations weekly and sometimes daily with mothers of other Black victims about these experiences of grief.

I, too, have been criticized by people affiliated with BLM because I advocate for mothers who lost children to neighborhood violence. I have been told that speaking about these murdered children would "dilute" BLM's message.

While many people have expressed support for BLM out of a desire to support victims' families, that was never BLM's priority. If it were, mothers like Simpson and Rice would have been cared for financially, mentally and emotionally, instead of being ridiculed in their suffering.

The movement to hold BLM accountable is growing. A new initiative involving the original 10 BLM chapters—the BLM 10 Plus movement—is now seeking transparency and accountability from the organization about how and where donated funds have been used. The father of Michael Brown Jr, the black teen shot by police in Ferguson in 2014, has joined the movement.

In January, I helped launch a new initiative called Voices of Black Mothers United to honor the lives of our murdered children by creating communities that are safe for everyone. We are bringing together mothers of fallen children and community partners to heal and strengthen communities by supporting intervention and sensible police reform.

We join a growing chorus of parents and community activists demanding accountability and transparency from BLM.

BLM and its affiliates should be very clear about their priorities so that people understand what they are supporting when they send a check. If BLM doesn't intend to operate as a charity, it should be up front about that. But more than anything, its leaders need to be willing to answer for the rise in neighborhood violence that occurred in the wake of their call to defund the police. Crime is skyrocketing and police officers are quitting in droves.

Activist groups like BLM should support families grieving the loss of a child to homicide. The first step is to provide wellness checkups, and assess the need for mental health assistance, financial assistance and other services to ensure the family's stability.

One of the most effective ways to move forward after the death of a child is to find a way to serve others through the loss. That's why, in addition to offering support and healing to these mothers, it's important also to offer them a platform to speak to the specific challenges facing our neighborhoods in the areas of crime reduction and police reform. Loss often gives tremendous clarity and insight into these problems, and we must remember that parents play an important role in helping our nation progress.

The deaths of Black Americans shouldn't be buying luxury homes for BLM leaders. The movement's first priority should be to support the families of victims and to foster community-based approaches to ending violence and discrimination against innocent Black victims. I'm sick of Black Lives Matter leaders profiting off our murdered children. It needs to stop.

Sylvia Bennett-Stone is the Director of Voices of Black Mothers United, a project of The Woodson Center in Washington, DC. She lives in Birmingham, Alabama.

 

Read the full Op-Ed on Newsweek. 

 
 
 
 
 
 

 

 
 
 

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To stop the violence, listen to the victims’ mothers — like me https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/to-stop-the-violence-listen-to-the-victims-mothers-like-me/ Wed, 30 Jun 2021 18:29:15 +0000 https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/?p=206 Defunding the police isn’t the answer. Instead, we need positive policing

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To stop the violence, listen to the victims' mothers - like me 

To stop the violence, listen to the victims' mothers - like me

By Sylvia Bennett-Stone 

About 17 years ago, I got that call in the middle of the night that every parent dreads. The caller ID said “University Hospital,” and immediately, I assumed something bad had happened to my 19-year-old daughter Krystal Joy. As I heard the voice on the phone, I first thought Krystal and her best friend Terrin had been in a car accident. I woke up my husband, and we rushed to the hospital, praying the entire ride there. We were met by a chaplain and a doctor.

“Tell me the girls are okay,” I begged them.

The doctor shook her head. “I’m so sorry — I can’t tell you that.”

The shock was so great that I passed out. I later found out that night that the cause of Krystal and Terrin’s deaths wasn’t actually a car accident, but a gunshot wound. They were at a gas station, when three men started arguing with each other. The argument quickly escalated into a gun fight, and a single bullet from a rifle went through Krystal’s body and into Terrin’s heart.

The girls’ deaths made national news, and our community in Alabama was outraged. One of the men was arrested right away, U.S. Marshals extradited the other from California. Both men were charged with capital murder.

Everyone knew Krystal and Terrin were good girls. Strangers would come up to me in the street and promise me, “If I see those guys, I plan on killing them.” I got letters from inmates in Alabama’s prisons that said, “If they come here, we’ll make sure they die.”

Street violence claims so much more than the murder victims alone: the parents, grandparents, and other relatives who struggle to go on after experiencing the death of a child. The emotional blow can trigger a wide range of psychological problems, including the risk of suicideStudies have even shown that mothers have an increased chance of dying within several years of losing a child to violence.

I have spent the years since losing Krystal counseling other mothers whose children have been killed. Often, we’ll talk all night long. Some will sit in silence on the phone for hours, because they’re worried if they hang up, they won’t make it through the night. I know firsthand the power of having someone to share your burden.

Over the last few years, cellphone videos of police brutality against unarmed Black people have rightly generated national outrage. Those lives matter greatly — but they represent a fraction of the number of Black people who are killed each week in our neighborhoods, including a growing number of children who are caught in crossfire.

2020 saw a spike in violence and murders across America. The FBI reported a 20% increase in killings nationwide in the first nine months of last year. The Gun Violence Archive reported that 2020′s shootings and firearm-related incidents were the highest level in over two decades. In the midst of hurting, some mothers are wondering if the #DefundThePolice movement could have contributed to the loss of their child, as law enforcement may have become more passive.

Defunding the police isn’t the answer. Instead, we need positive policing — including funding to train police in de-escalation and conflict-resolution skills. We need public-safety measures that ensure that our communities are safe. We must identify neighborhood risk factors that often contribute to a violent environment, and give the residents of these neighborhoods the education, mental health resources, child and teen mentorship, and legal services they need.

That’s why I have joined other mothers of murdered children to start a new initiative today: the Voices of Black Mothers United initiative. We’ve come together to honor the lives of our fallen children by helping to create safer communities for everyone. Our mission is to bring together law enforcement and community partners to support solutions to senseless violence with community-based intervention and sensible police reform.

If there had been a police officer at the gas station that night, Krystal and Terrin might still be alive. If a community leader had spent time mentoring those young men, maybe they would have been able to manage their disagreement without pulling out guns.

Krystal and Terrin would have gotten their gas and been on their way. They would have finished college, become pediatricians like they’d always planned, and had families of their own. For the sake of our children, we must stop the senseless violence in our neighborhoods.

Sylvia Bennett-Stone is the director of Voices of Black Mothers United, an initiative of the Woodson Center in Washington, DC. She was raised in Long Island, but now lives in Birmingham, Ala.

 

 

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‘Voices of Black Mothers United’: They’ve Lost Children to Violence, but They Don’t Want to Defund Police https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/voices-of-black-mothers-united-theyve-lost-children-to-violence-but-they-dont-want-to-defund-police/ Tue, 22 Jun 2021 15:21:18 +0000 https://www.voicesofblackmothers.com/?p=200 In the ongoing debate over calls to defund police departments, one emerging group is saying, "not so fast."

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'Voices of Black Mothers United': They've Lost Children to Violence, but They Don't Want to Defund Police

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